I’d like to share a happy revelation I recently had.
Last week Aaron and I ate dinner with a family he sometimes cooks with. Good food is always good and the couple was good company, but it was their four year old twin boys that truly made my night. Aaron had told me about their awesomeness but it’s something you have to experience to fully appreciate. We played with legos, chased them around the living room, gave them piggy back rides, giggled when David kissed me and every time Matthew made googly eyes at me, and I smiled the whole time Aaron read their bedtime story, Dr. Seuss’s “My Many Colored Days”. That’s my Super Summary; I’d love to cover all the details since everything made me so happy but that would take forever and a day. So! The kids – they’re smart, sweet, well-behaved, well-mannered, they had no trouble at all melting my heart. People could use lessons from them 😛
A few days later I was reading a book that brought something up about raising kids. My mind ventured into, like, a ten minute daydream about what it will be like when I get to that point. I enjoy children but used to cringe thinking about having my own screaming, smelly, needy brats. This time was different – I had a silly, giddy smile on my face. And I realized how far I’ve come in my beliefs and feelings about someday being a parent.
When I was 10, my brother was born. A few months later, after he stopped developing normally, he was diagnosed with autism. Children with autism are not easy to deal with and after that experience I spent several years of my life scared of ever having to deal with raising a child. Some of the brats I’ve babysat didn’t help my attitude either. Or my mom, who always says things like “Just wait until you have kids, you have no idea what you’re in for”, lots of negative implication in her words and tone. Also, I used to be so bitter toward society that I said I never wanted to voluntarily bring someone into this world to have to deal with all its bullshit. Well I’ll have you know that my brother is the most lovable boy I’ve ever met. And during my twenty-one years of life I’ve grown to love life in all its glory (and bullshit).
Who honestly expects parenting to be a walk in the park? Since when is anything that’s easy also rewarding? I’m suddenly so excited to bring life to Life, to show it everything I’ve seen and have yet to see. To watch a person from its bare beginnings – a child created from two people who love each other and will love their creation with everything they have. I have a long way to go before my little ones come. Lots of time to prepare in all the ways that are necessary, which includes getting super excited all the time for precious, innocent, (screaming, smelly, needy) little babies! I’ll be ready for the ups and downs, the delights and hardships. I’m grateful for everything that brought me to this conclusion, especially Matthew and David’s awesomeness 🙂
PS. I started watching Babies, a documentary following four babies from around the world from birth to first steps. I shed some tears when they were born, that’s how good it is. Besides the pure joy the content of the film brings, it has some really beautiful cinematography. You MUST watch the trailer!